Wednesday – 19^th Week in Ordinary Time

Gospel – Matthew 18:15-20

Happy? Birthday

Church of Holy Sepulchre, Jerusalem

A mom broke hearts on TikTok when she shared the devastating news that her son was all alone during his own birthday party when “literally zero people showed up. In the video, she said all 22 kids invited to JJ’s sixth birthday party were no-shows.  She also shared heartbreaking details that her son was left playing in the park by himself with decorations and cupcakes set up for the party.

“So, we’re sitting at the park for JJ’s birthday party, we got everything ready, his party started half an hour ago,” the heartbroken mom said in the voiceover describing the situation. “He had literally zero people show up for his birthday. My poor little man.”

That video amassed more than 543,000 likes and more than 20,000 comments with many viewers sending birthday wishes, sharing similar situations that happened to them or their children, and offering to send JJ gifts. However, the mom has refused the gifts, saying that the offers are greatly appreciated but asked that they instead be sent to children’s hospitals. She also insisted that JJ wanted to spend time with friends, not receive gifts, but that the “outreach has been phenomenal.”

Remember getting picked last for a baseball game?  Or someone close to you completely forgetting your birthday?  Remember inviting all your best friends out for dinner and the only response you got was ‘crickets’?  Remember how bad it felt, how much it hurt?

Face it, we have all had those moments when someone hurt us deeply.  Maybe it was deliberate, maybe unintentional; either way we are in pain and we are angry!  What do we do with all that negative emotion?  Many of us, myself included, tend to keep it inside.  We fume and grumble and complain (to ourselves); we let it fester and grow until we reach the point where we take it out on everyone around us.  What was once a problem between 2 people turns into something that affects the whole family, the entire community. 

Jesus, in today’s Gospel, recognizes our ‘oh so’ human condition and provides a way out, a way to resolve the issue and heal the wounds.  But it is not easy.  It requires honesty, truth and a willingness to forgive, to be forgiven and to heal. 

First, quit gossiping and complaining to others!  The issue is between the two of you; so go directly to that person and speak your grievance.  Challenging?  Of course, but in the process, you are not just healing the relationship; you are healing yourself, getting rid of those negative feelings and resentments.  Besides, how many times have you faced the other person, and it was only then that they realized they had hurt you.  All that pain you carried around and they never knew, never realized!  Second, if one-on-one doesn’t work, then bring 2 other people with you as witnesses and try again.  And if that doesn’t work, if they refuse to acknowledge their fault, then and only, then bring it to the whole community.

Drastic?  Yes!  Necessary? Yes!  There is a basic message here Jesus is trying to teach – sin affects everyone.  Anger and resentment and jealousy and hate, if ignored, will only deepen and end up affecting the whole community, the whole family.  As much as we are in pain and hurting, it will only get worse if we don’t seek to confront it and attempt to heal.  That takes courage, honesty, a willingness to forgive and be forgiven, and love, especially love! 

Jesus gave the Apostles the keys to the Kingdom, the power to bind and to loosen.  But He has given to all of us the power to forgive and the command to love each other!

Great Spirit, help me today to be humble, to realize that we are all fragile creatures.  Let me not attack others but seek to heal and mend old wounds and rebuild relationships.